Am I good enough?
Imagine not having anything to say, imagine not having anything to write about. in fact there's so much to write about, I couldn't keep up, so I don't do it and then when I do sit down to write about it, the monkey mind joins in and I can't think of anything to start with. Judgement takes over: “no one wants to hear this s***”
Ha ha!, I was typing using the microphone and it looks like Google likes to edit words!
I'm busy juggling lack and abundance. I see abundance everywhere; the rain, fruits in the trees, on the ground; the grass, the wind, the sounds of the birds, so when I'm present I feel full and complete. But when I think about the future, even little plans like grocery shopping, or looking in my diary to plan ahead, I feel lack. I worry about my bank balance, “how I will pay my bills? how will I have enough clients? is enough money coming in…?” . It’s a conflict. Because I am aware of how my energy directly affects what comes in, what I am capable of receiving, I know that I have inner work to do.
I am afraid that it is a belief about worthiness and being deserving. There are still old echoes of my past rattling around, the voice of ‘Could do better’ which equates to ‘I am not enough’. It is very crazy as I have shifted over the past 2 years already but the inner work never stops. The journey goes on as long as we want, or we can sit in it, staying the same. This is hard as once you are aware that you can change, you know you cannot accept staying the same on the surface - until you break up with the belief that ‘I am not enough’ it will only be surface changes though. And I hear that it is a choice to listen to that critical voice, but … it is so familiar, it feels like it is part of me. Time to change the identity, time to peel the onion layers around my true self.
My ego is screaming ‘but you will be good enough when…’ with as many different endings as there are possibilities! Most of it is about external recognition - I will feel loved when I get to (insert latest mind based goal here) instead of heart based intention or desire. So I know without doubt that I am working on this stuff….
In the meantime, my heart-based intention for October is to help more people become free of self sabotage, which is why, despite the bank account (I overspent on the kids in the summer, to give them new experiences), I have greatly reduced my price for Rapid Transformational Therapy so that it is more immediately accessible to anyone who is feeling the pinch.
If you want to make deep change in your life, you know that if you could do it alone, you would have already; So take advantage of this offer today. You will wonder why you didn’t do this sooner! Book a call with me here: https://beckyboothappointments.as.me/RTTexplore